Rob and Jan

Another 3 months have whizzed by since the last update, time seems to go quicker as you get older (miserable excuse number 42 for being late with an update)!

February was a wonderfully warm month, we got a lot of gardening done and we thought that summer had arrived early, unfortunately it hadn’t, March was a lot colder and wetter, bugger…….

Marc, Matthew, Debs and others went skiing to Lake Tahoe (in California) in February, their regular winter sports destination. While they were there, we got a phone call from Matt and Marc asking me to log onto a live webcam where we could see them all waving to us from a cafe at the start of one of the ski lifts. The wonders of modern technology!

Part of the reason for the crap weather in March was due to David and Pauline flying down to spend a few days with us, the sun shone for a few hours after they arrived and then stayed away until after they had left. It’s a job convincing people from the UK that Lascazeres is much sunnier than England!

Jan and Pauline

This picture of Jan and Pauline by a well was taken at Bassoues. I thought it was a wishing well but when I threw some money in and made a wish, Jan didn’t turn into Cameron Diaz, so that was a waste of 5 cents, perhaps 10 cents would have been more effective!

Despite the weather we had a great time when David and Pauline were here, we went out and about around the local area and they treated us to a meal in Maubourguet one lunchtime. We played Ludo a couple of times in the evening, bloody hectic lives we live down here, we were going to play snakes and ladders as well but I thought the excitement would be too much for me! Anyway, Pauline cheats, or was it me, I can’t remember…….

David got tickets to see Portsmouth win through to something, FA cup final I think. Not sure who they are playing as football is not my favourite sport, poor David; he was confusing me with someone who gives a shit when he was talking enthusiastically about the final.

When I was younger, much, much younger, I used to support Pompey and watch them play at Fratton Park, then I discovered girls, far more interesting and the games were a lot more fun (still are!). Oh, I did watch England win the World Cup in 1966 but that was the last game I saw. Sorry football fans, each to their own, you carry on watching your fit, healthy young men running around the pitch and I’ll continue to enjoy watching fit, healthy young women wherever I see them….. Who said ‘dirty old pervert’? Less of the ‘old’ if you don’t mind!

Our neighbour, France, asked us if we would prune her fruit trees, so, calling on the knowledge gained from Jan’s Dad we did our best to look as if we knew what we were doing. None of the trees have died yet so that’s a good sign! I’ve told her she might not get any fruit this year, this gives me another year to think up an excuse if there’s no fruit next year…

Except in really cold weather our front door is always open during the day so that the dogs can come and go. We can always tell which dog came through first, if it’s just open a dog’s width, Daisy was there first, if it’s hanging off it’s hinges, then Rokxy was first in!!

Rokxy in her normal winter coat, i.e. covered in mud!

Rokxy riding side saddle

Daisy

Daisy flying 3 feet above the ground just after catching a tennis ball, sorry it’s blurred but she wouldn’t hold the pose long enough for me to get a good picture….

Rokxy had her annual rabies jab in February, plus one for red tick, the vet then sent us a card saying we needed to take her back for a follow up jab. When we got there, we had to wait for a while before we saw the vet, Rokxy was reluctant to go into the waiting room but that was nothing compared to the game we had getting her into the consulting room! We had to slide her across the floor on her bum, when 5 stone of exceedingly strong dog doesn’t want to move, brute force is the only answer! After all the hassle, the vet said they had made a mistake and she didn’t need another injection, Rokxy was very confused but more then happy to leave without any treatment.

Our friend Bob had an old ride-on mower which was beyond economic repair. He decided to get a new one and when I asked him if I could buy the old one he said I could have it. I may be able to repair the mower bit, but if not I will make a trailer for it so we can move heavy stuff around the garden, plus I can tow a heavy roller to try to get the lawn more like a normal lawn and less like a ploughed field…

Talking of lawn mowers, we’ve had our new mower about a year and whilst it works pretty well it does have a few limitations. It is sooooooo sloooooooooooow, the speed is fixed which can be a bit frustrating as the daisies and dandelions seem to have time to duck before the blade decapitates them. By contrast, the old hover mover used to chop the buggers to pieces before they knew what had hit them! At least this one collects the grass cuttings but the bumpy ground doesn’t help, another reason for getting a heavy roller.

Bruno moved into his new house about 3 weeks ago, we were invited in for a drink and then asked to stay for a meal, we arrived at 7pm and left at about 11:30 after several whiskies and glasses of wine, a meal and lots of French that I didn’t understand! The house is very nice, it’s just about finished inside but there’s still a lot to do in the garden….

Bruno’s house, God’s rainbow….

There is going to be a duck ‘farm’ along the road from us, it’s on the other side of the road, about a third of a mile across the fields. Apparently it will be a small farm and hopefully will not be an issue for us as the prevailing wind will blow any smell away from us.

The French version of health and safety seems somewhat different to the UK. When they dug a trench across the road for the services to the duck farm, they put a warning sign in the road either side of the trench, then went on their usual 2 hour lunch break with just the digger arm preventing traffic falling into the hole. I think they work on the theory that if you don’t have the common sense to miss a bloody great digger arm guarding a hole you deserve to fall in and break your neck! This of course would never work in the UK as the nanny state has removed common sense from everyday life.

In mid April we went to stay with Marianne and Ian for 4 days, we had a wonderful relaxing time, lots to eat and drink despite their kitchen not having a working cooker or sink (they were waiting for the new granite worktops to be fitted). We went to Andorra for some cheap booze and cigarettes, shopped at the first town across the border (Pas de la Casa (Margate with snow!)) and then went further towards the capital to another village. The scenery away from the town was beautiful but the whole place is very commercialised with new hotels being built everywhere. It was bloody cold up there, they had a fall of snow the night before we went. We didn’t try to exceed our cigarette and alcohol limits as the gendarmes stop most cars to enquire about what you have bought.

Puivert Castle through the mist, spooky, you can almost imagine the Cathars appearing on the battlements, you can’t? Nor me, just thought it was the sort of bollocks people say about pictures with mist and castles in them!

We also went to the fortified city of Carcassonne, it was restored in the 1850s and is well worth a visit, free entry, although you have to pay for parking. Avoid the tourist season to get the most from a visit, all the usual tacky tourist crap being sold in the shops but the rest is amazing.

Part of the Citéde Carcassonne

?I thought I was pretty crap at playing pool until I played Marianne! They have a small pool table in their bar and we spent an hilarious afternoon playing the Puivert World Pool Championships, I won of course….. Trouble is, Marianne was improving the more games we played whereas I reached my peak several years ago, Jan keeps saying that as well, don’t think she was talking about pool though!

When we went to Andorra we shut the dogs in their cage, Daisy managed to get out, partially wrecking it in the process. So, when we went to Carcassonne Marianne said it would be fine to leave them in their downstairs summer kitchen (they’re posh, they’ve got 2 kitchens!). The only thing fine about that idea was the fine old time they had while we were out. They chewed up a bath mat, dustpan and brush, the extractor hose on the tumble dryer and god knows what else! It’s a good job Marianne saw the funny side of it, mind you, we’ve not heard from them since!

While we were with Marianne, Jean-Claude our local farmer, delivered the long awaited trailer load of cow poo, we’d only been waiting since January so quite quick really. I gave him a bottle of whisky and he delivered a second load a few days later, which is enough to keep us in the crap for a while!

So, what with spreading cow poo on the garden and clearing up dog crap on a regular basis, if Shit Shovelling ever becomes an Olympic sport I’ll be up there with the best of them!

About 2 weeks ago there was a loud knocking noise from the rear of the car, I initially thought it was the exhaust but it was a broken shock absorber, luckily a local car accessory shop had 2 in stock and I changed them in a couple of hours, it’s a bugger not having a company car and just ringing up for someone to fix it for you free of charge…

Last Sunday was the Lascazeres plant market (Marchՠaux Plantes), it was started some years ago by local Brits, all the plants are donated and profits go to charity (a different one each year). It has become very popular and the French support it as well as the Brits. Jan bought quite a few things (no surprise there then) including 2 fig trees for the exorbitant sum of two euros each!

We’re off to see Rob and June for a couple of days at their holiday home near Bergerac, about 2.5 hours drive from here. I have improved the security of the dog cage in the hope that they don’t repeat the performance at Mariannes!

Jan’s Dad is hoping to come out for a visit with Jan’s nephew (Andrew) in early June. I’m saving all the tough gardening jobs for them as the pool should be nice and warm by then and I can relax with a beer while supervising their efforts.

We are going back to the UK in early July as our ‘adopted daughter’ Gemma is getting married. We’ve known Gemma since she was about 2 and have watched her grow into a beautiful young woman, despite having an ugly old git for a father (our friend Pat)!

Thought for the Blog:

With reference to my earlier ramblings about football… Footballers, they get paid how much for buggering up a nicely mown lawn? I’m not jealous you understand, why would I want pots of money, a large house and?several?cars when I’ve got Jan, she’s worth more than all those things, so, any offers over 1 million pounds seriously considered…..

Well, that’s it, all the latest news, wonderful wasn’t it? I bet you’re all jealous of us playing Ludo and shovelling cow crap, we wouldn’t change it for the world (did I ever tell you I’m an inveterate liar?).

Comments:

1. What, me, an ugly old git? You must need stronger glasses. Then again…

Comment by Pat — May 5, 2008